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Community Corner

The Secret to Motherhood is a Simple One

An inspirational friend reveals her secret to mom columnist Christine MacKenzie.

This weekend I spent my Saturday evening saying farewell and good luck to a dear friend who is moving out of state. A dear friend who is, without a doubt, one of the strongest, bravest and most amazing moms I have ever met.

As I discussed in October, my friend Daisy is currently battling stage four breast cancer. That, however, hasn’t stopped this mother of three from raising her family and, at the same time, sharing her wisdom and her advice. Let’s face it, motherhood isn’t easy under the best of circumstances but, then again, I suppose it’s the challenges that really prove just how dedicated a mom is.

So, as this mom prepares to embark on a new journey, miles away from her current home what does she think holds her family together? What, according to Daisy, is the key to being a great mom? 

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Well, it seems that it’s not all that difficult. Her key to motherhood is a very simple four letter word; love. Her advice is as simple as it could possibly be.

“Tuck your kids in, tell them you love them and set a good example every day,” she said. 

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Let’s be totally and completely honest. Do all of us, as moms, really kiss our kids goodnight and remind them how much we love them every day? Are we always there at bedtime? Do we always think to remind them how important they are?

In all likelihood, no. We simply do not take, or have, the time to do what Daisy reminds us is the most important thing of all. Life gets busy and we, as moms, sometimes struggle to do all the right things on a daily basis.

As the mom of a 12-year-old boy I completely understand that he would rather face an armed assassin than have his mom hug and kiss him in public. I have learned to respect that and now that, even if I am the coolest mom on earth, I am not cool enough to hug him in front if his friends. Yes, motherhood has its limits and hugging in public is, without a doubt, one of them.

That doesn’t mean, however, that I don’t love my son or that he doesn’t love me. As a matter of fact I have been thinking about Daisy’s words long and hard and reminding myself over and over again how very wise they are. Yes, I have snuck into his room a few times to get in an extra goodnight kiss and, yes, I have taken the time to remind him just how much I love him. 

Perhaps it may not seem important to him now, but someday knowing that his mom loved him unconditionally will, without a doubt, make a big difference in his world. Someday he will look back and know that, beyond a shadow of a doubt, his mom considered him first and foremost in her world.

As far as I’m concerned a huge part of motherhood is about listening to, and learning from, others and I feel so lucky to have friends like Daisy to point me in the right direction. Yes, spending each and every day reminding our kids how much we love them is, without a doubt, the most important priority a mom should have.

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