Things You learn whether you want to or not

        When I was younger I wrote very specific goals for myself.  I made vacation plans a year away.  I knew where I was going to college.  I set out to make friends with certain people I thought were interesting.  I told some friends that I wanted them to be friends for life.  I was very intentional about my relationships, trips and choices. 

                Going to college exposed me to friends who are still friends today.  Some people who I thought would be friends for life have dropped away from my circle.  The fact that I moved from the West Coast to the East Coast may explain some of that.  And, I have made new friends. 

                I have friends who are really “family” in every sense of the word.  We are close and share many thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment.  Some friends live close by and some live far away.  Distance doesn’t matter with friends since we still talk and share our lives. 

                This past week listening has been important.  And, I have realized that listening doesn’t mean giving any verbal response.  Listening to friends and family members about their fears, frustrations and hurts takes time and the ability to hear. 

                Hearing is primarily done with our ears and brain.  But, this week I have added hearing with the heart.  The sound waves enter the ear canal, hit the eardrum, vibrate the bones in the middle ear, move the fluid in the labyrinth, and send the signal to the brain where it is interpreted.   The signal is sent to the heart where it is heard with our feelings and understanding. 

      As an audiologist I have stressed hearing protection when going to a concert.  I have stressed the need for hearing aids when the hearing mechanism is damaged.  Listening with the heart, with understanding seems just as important.  Having empathy and sympathy for our family and friends is really hearing with our hearts.